i'll be on the top just watching you fall

i am amazing.honestly i am. i just made my own dinner, (without anyone's help!!!!!111) (( okay maybe Seck Wei's help, but only a little!)) and it's surprisingly edible. know what that means? it means i'm actually not that dumb as i appear to be! okay scratch that.

okay. hello. how are you. wtf.
i hate the fact that i have to remove my nail polish before tomorrow rolls around.
and addmath. seriously i cbf.

okay im a little busy now so this post would be ended abruptly again.
OH ANYWAY - TOMORROW SCHOOL REOPENS FML.

prolly gonn be busy with lots of things again...

XOXO LOVE ALWAYS

i don't wanna waste another night, i don't wanna keep on chasing lights

it must be all the heat appliances.
i've been using the straightener, and the blow dryer on the highest mode every single day,
and now..
my hair is officially labeled as DRY.
i knew this day would come.

you've taken everything away and all thats left is this shell ; thats me

1. Are u hot tempered?
depends on the situation. if someone wronged me in any way or did something atrociously horrible, i could be the biggest bitch you can ever handle. but normally i'm really nice and calm. :)


2. Have you given your first kiss away?
hahahahhahahahahahah yeah long time ago. wasn't nice though.


3. Where is the place that you want to go the most?
tokyo. or paris. :)


4. friends or family ?
i'm not that attached to my family to be honest.


5. Do you believe in seeing a rainbow after the rain?
I don't believe. I hope. I'm going through this turbulent thunderstorm right now and i'm clinging on to the slightest splinter of faith to get me through.


6. What are you afraid to lose the most now?
my sanity. my best friends. i can't afford to lose ANYTHING right now so i'm clinging on to em tighhhht rarr


7. If you win $1 million, what would you do?
might sound shallow but i'll go shopping hahh. and probably get some things i wanna get for now, presents for em loved ones and a car.


8. If you meet someone that you love, would you confess to him/her?
you can't just MEET someone and say, oh i love him. thats not gonna happen, i think loving someone needs time and more time. I've been IN love, but nothing deeper than that yet, which is a shame really. But well, if i have someone i truly love, i think it would depend on the situation. Don't think i would confess if it wasn't mutual though, couldn't take rejection that well.


9. List out 3 good points of the person who tagged you.
a sex kitten :D , absolutely gorgeous inside out and a good writer.

10. What are the requirement(s) that you wish from your other half?
hhahahhaha are we being truthful here? mmkay i prefer someone who takes care of himself physically, with good hair :) and someone cute of course. someone i could stare at from night till day and wouldn't get bored of. Someone who makes an effort, someone who takes care of me, someone who's entertaining and has a sense of humor, someone who likes the same stuff that i do, someone caring, someone truthful, someone who would hold my hand when I'm cold, someone like...♥

11. Which type of person do you hate the most?
oh so we're being truthful again? I hate people who thinks they know you SO well when they effing don't. I dislike people who goes into my personal life too much without consent, people who annoys me and stalks every fibre of my being and being irritating. Liars, backstabbers, cheaters, people filled with bullshit. Some busybodies who sticks their fat ass into every matter and trying to be all involved and shiz, so idiotic.


12. How much do you love your friends?
i really do. :) well SOME of them anyway, they're really important t me as they keep my sanity in check


13. If you have faults, would you rather the people around you point out to you or wound you rather they keep quiet?
If it's mistakes i made in the past, or flaws i can't change like for instance, having a pudgy nose or whatever then yes, shut the eff up. but if it's stuff like hurting someone or something then i would prefer my close friends to point out to me of course. :) if you're totally not close to me and don't even know the effing full story then please just go mind your business? I have people like these, not knowing the effing whole story but coming around me and hurling insults and trying to be a judge. Makes you look like a loser

14. What do you think is the most important thing in your life?
God's definitely important to me, but along with compassion, love, and faith


15. If there's an option, what would u like to do in the future?
preferably something in PR? or something that doesn't require me doing the same damn thing daily.


16. What makes you feel happy?
Love - from my friends♥ , family, other half, God, anything. and nice clothes. :D and... having your wish come true.

17. If you have a chance, which part of your character you would like to change?
being so damn emotional. and insecure.


18. What is the last shocking thing you've seen or heard?
i've heard so many things lately, that it's not even fairly shocking to me anymore. but most probably that this girl, who's being a huger hypocrite than i am, coming to me and telling me stuff that she DIDN'T believe in in the past. thats idiotic isn't it? but thats alright, she's still one of my friend and i'll support her decisions no matter how nonsensical and how much i'm hurting inside.


19. What makes you feel disappointed?
being lied to, not being worth it for the truth, being let down, having high hopes then watching em all crushed down.. yeah i had high hopes.


20. What are you addicted to?
im kind of addicted to shopping, the internet, eyeliner YUMMM, pixie lott, and wallowing in my self pity.

x
we'd be so less fragile, if we were made from metal,
and our hearts from iron,
and our minds from steel,
and if we built an armor for our tender bodies,
could we love each other?
would we stop to feel?

put your arms around me..when it gets too hot we can go insidee ;)

i swear i don't know why i'm even feeling this way. honestly i'm just @ a phase and i just need time to clear stuff from my system and try to figure out the cure or whatev. but the truth is, i kind of KNOW what could be the cure. i SO know it and sigh, i've been craving for it since august i've just got NO self control. i think you could brand my obsession as the obsession fer nicotine, or maybe worse.

slept @ 7AM last night, doing silly things. went for brekkie @ 4 in the morning and ended up staying till 6.30AM. nothing really interesting, just the normal bimbotic dramatic me being incredibly irritating. that was my thursday.

Wednesday ; twenty something August
slept @ 4 in the morning ALONE since parents are both outstation, sigh what a loser. was so lonely :(
alright and woke up @ 8AM - tres early i know! i'm a superhuman. primped and prepped & Carena came over @ around 9, spent most of the time doing our hair. my hair is a bitch! especially them bangs they're the worst.

was attempting to make my bangs stay DOWN. and not to like, act chio :P

Met up with William @ 10AM and went over to Sunway t meet up with Fiona, KH, Lynn, & Wen Jun. i loved Wen Jun's pants oh my goshhh :D had japanase for lunch. except it prolly shouldn't be considered LUNCH since i only ate edamame peas! no appetite to stuff down anything else cuz everything i see on t menu reminds me of him pff.
then we headed over to redbox and i sang like, alot. chhhhyeah sniffles. : (

haven't been kissed in ages :P

was gonn watch a movie, but i've watched SO many movies during the holidays that i don't know what to watch anymore.
KH came to pick us up (HE IS TOO NICE OMG) and was caught in the rainy jam for like an hour or so.

DANGEROUS DRIVING!! :p

Reached The Cave @ 7.30PM sharp! gosh we are too punctual for our own good :P
it was Hilary's birthday dinner. :) she's such a sweet thing!
the ambience was really cool but the food was just.... alright. nothing much to shout about actually.

Jenny, HILARY :D, Carena, and me :)

photogs? :P

Carena, Annita, Shu-Yi, William, Jenny, Hilary :D and me

Reached home @ around 11PM and continued immersing myself in my own wallowness.

these days im so afuckingnnoyed at people. angsty? some overly sensitive people? some desperate people who's been on my tail irritating the eff outta me!!!!! ignorance is bliss.
but sometimes the monstrosity of ignoring takes its toll on me. dementors are defo everywhere. and i can't believe (WHATS NEW???) that i effing believed AGAIN. again again. when are you gonn learn PJ?
if your heart was truly broken, you'd be dead.

x

cause you really got it wrong, i didnt steal your boyfriend

well i'm sorry,
that he called me
and i answered the telephone.


theres this girl. who reads my blog,
and is a huge whore who practically hits on any guys,
and is not afraid to admit it.
but the thing is,
isn't it a little TOO much of a coincidence that she went out with my exes?
in the span of lets say, 6 months?
she's like, indirectly kissing me.
hee hee. if you get what i mean.

indirectly kissing me... yeah i guess thats what she really wanted,
because it's TOO much of a coincidence. (2 EXES??)


take em anyway :)

have you heard theres this thing that heals, and it's called time

of crazy driving, high-pitched tones, tonnes of eyeliner & bright lights.

L O V E's just another word i never learned to pronounce

honestly, can't really remember what i have been up to lately. not significant enough to leave an impact on me.
so if i had to crack my head really hard to remember..
monday,
woke up pretty late like @ 2PM. & went t catch a movie with a friend. gyah no offence, but boring day.
tuesday,
woke up late again for lunch with Carena and her friend. rushed there in my PYJAMAS. how embarrassing. and my hair was being a bitch so i looked like a mess. had chicken kebabs @ secret recipe. Carena's friend suggested to go catch a movie (Carena had t go f chem tuition, sheeet.) so we went over to Ou to catch UP. (again, i know.) but this time in 3d, gyah boring. Knocked my head HARD while getting outta the cab, how embarrassing. it's still swollen now, so painful. then went home real early cuz my contacts were hurting the eff outta me and i kept on tearing. eyeliner was smudged left right centre. and cuz i was fuck bored and needed a bake.
at night Sharon and Jenny came over with their laptops for a facebook party. HAHAHAHAH wtf.
grr im so hungry right now, had chicken kebabs, vanilla cake, huge bowl of cherries, and two hard boiled eggs.
pretty boring. ( i know, i've said the word 'boring' for the third time now)

tomorrow, C's coming over my place and off to Sunway. Hilary's birthday dinner at night. i hope tomorrow's worth remembering. spazzzz.
my life's so filled with drama that it can be made into a korean drama already. honestly.
just today, i was so effing pissed and peeved off at people constantly lying. not just one, not two, but almost a whole bunch. people like these seriously needs to go fuck themselves and get some endorphines.

i'm being a huge bitch lately. but mostly to mean and idiotic people. :) so don't worry about it.


of glittery gold nails, sexy cherries & hope

p/s : karma's gonna bite your arse when you LEAST expect it.
p/p/s : I MISS ZOE ZOE ZOE ZOE ZOE ZOE ZOE ZOE ZOE . :( had a short phone call with her today and she makes me feel SO much better :) ily!♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥


p/p/p/s : do i say i'm sorry cuz the word's never gonna come out, liar.

x

hungry

hello! :) i missed you heheh.
lets start off from where we left off shall we? i guess most people should know i chopped off my fringe on thursday, and so on friday i met up with William to watch ILYBETHCOOPER. :D
and it's a pretty funny show, NOT predictable cuz i don't know whats gonna happen next, :)
oh then we WALKED... yes WALKED.. yes WALKED..
to Curve, oh my gosh hahah! i'm so proud of myself! we went to redbox while waited for Chia Sing. :)
then after that we felt hungry so we WALKED... yes WALKED.. yes WALKED
back to OU. we are amazing people, i know. we had some durian thing which i don't know how to describe.. but it was good! :D then that night SJ ended up picking me back home.. oops :P
i loved this strawberry hot chocolate! :D
from NYNY deli.


on Saturday, it was HARRY's birthdayyyy! :D yayyy happy birthday Harry. :)
we went t watch.. UP! :] at Ou. we didn't catch the 3D one tho and the movie's helluva depressing. :(
you can actually feel gray watching it, but i like the beginning it's so cute! :D
yeap yeap was a nice movie. hahaha highlight of the day was Nigel tripping in the cinema! hahahah lolarious.
i was walking in front and when i turned around he was crouching on the fall with people in the cinema giggling :P pretty funny. He kinda sprained his ankle though (not funny). :(

then on Sunday, woke up pretty late cuz i was super tired. :(
went to Mid Valley for lunch, japanese! yayyy i love japanese heheh.
then went shopping, gosh i saw this amazing lilac colored bag in Topshop! probably gonn be mine soon. :P then bought stuff @ Miss Selfridge, saw a friend thats working there now! not saying her name cuz she's gorgeous! :P stalkers all of you.
alright then shopped around, till i almost forgot the time! came home @ around 11PM.
then some stupid stuff happened! i was locked inside my room! (by accident)
oh gosh, i was such an imbecile! Poor Sharon had to pick the lock for me. :) she's amazing! :D
then i felt hungry so went for supper with Jenny. :)
oh anyway!
i was wearing black for the whole of my weekends so i look like i'm wearing the same thng!
hahahahah! so my pictures kind of look like it's from the same day but it's not yeh! :P

oh my mom told me i look like Cleopatra. :O

gonna go out for a movie tomorrow! (yes, again. HAHAH)
so i'm probably gonna stop here,
goodnight x LOVE YOUUUU hehehe

i know you can't stay, so i won't be waiting, anticipating, for the fall

hey love. :)
i'm feeling rather accomplished, of reasons unstated. :) skipped school today, VERY good decision since only a fragment of the class decided to show up for some event thing.
instead, i went to cut my hair :O more like, chopped off my fringe. :( it was really heartbreaking at first.
and i realize i always make drastic decisions (YES CHOPPING OFF FRINGE IS A DRASTIC DECISION HEHH) after a..fling. hahahah oops hushhush. :) so yeah, i have bangs now. i look like an idiot. i look like a twelve year old. it's super high maintenance, i have to blow dry it with a round comb every single morning and after i bathe or whatever, and i can't help but have the urge to push it to the side which is an annoyance. whatever, hair grows wooop.
oh William went to have his hair cut too, and he looks alot better with it x! then we went to have tomyum. :D
oohhh i wanna watch ILY Beth Cooper. :D

oh by the wayyy !
i need braces, or retainers, DESPERATELYYYY.
my jawline is getting crooked and it shows ALOT.....
nomnomnom

ZOEEEEEEEEEEE :D
at the tomyum place.

two of my most precious gems :D
and sighhh me with bangs yehyehyeh i knowww it seems like time went back to 2007 :O

i feel like peeing so this post would be ended abruptly byeee!!!
WEEKENDS HAVE FUN PEOPLE X

i don't care about tomoro o o o ow.

i kinda sorta miss....
practicing the piano till it drove me crazy. till my arms began to feel sore. till my fingers began to peel. till my mind subconsciously replays the songs all night long.
even though i didn't even manage to scrape pass with a distinction last year :( doubt grade 8 is gonna be any easier. good luck to those taking the exam in August though, i know how nerve wrecking it could be ;)

the holidays are coming, really really soon. i know i probably should take this chance to brush up on my studies, which's like shit now. but perhaps i'll just use the time being out all the time from this place i unfortunately call home.
gosh, it's only a week. give it a break.

i have a sudden urge to go to Forever21 right now.
oh my God i wanna go on retail therapy so bad.

before i go,
_|_ ^^ _|_

for the guy who's mental acumen is well below par, albeit how good you may be in chemistry and theory.

i used to be lovedrunk,but now i'm hungover, I LOVE YOU FOREVER, forever is over.

Carene :)

My favourite pair of flats!

underneath the moon, underneath the stars, here's a little star - for you.

Hi :)

i really want to confide in a little someone,
i need comfort, i need solace.
someone.
but it seems like i'm wasting my time day by day,
i'll rather watch my hair grow.
anyway, :)
my weekends were pretty awesome.
pictures would come tomorrow or something cuz i'm using the lappie now.
i went to Sunway on Saturday at like, noon. :O
the cabbie kept on insisting i was foreign. only a fraction, actually but whatever.
so i spent like 11 hours @ Sunway. was really exhausted. :(
World Stage was alright. the bands were alright but i hated the crowd and the perverted idiots. yeah i need someone to protect me hee :P
alright anyway and there was like, a lot of annoying people who keeps on insisting you to join em and take pictures or whatev. just felt like poking my fan into their mouths.
and this dude who was standing behind me was being UNCOMFORTABLY near.
there was a number of times when i could feel his crotch. ew i know. and i would like move aside but he always ends up behind me, pervert.
and he's not even mildly good looking. long time since i've seen a good looking dude. sigh.
AND OMG. i love PIXIE LOTT. :P
hehehe. she is amazing. but it's kind of ironic that people who don't even know her before, are like such huge fans now. -.- whatever.
Brenda and Andrea are such lucky people! they got to meet her and get autographs hahah cool. :)
alright got home @ 11.30PM.

On Sunday, woke up real early and went to PC's Neway with a bunch of friends. :)
Carene can sing really,really well. haha :) and headed to OU after,
was planning to catch a movie (Proposal, again. -.-) but there weren't tickets :(
so we basically just ate ALOT. :O like seriously.
i have pikchers! but in my desktop. hahah :D
i'm rambling so much it must be so boring for you. :O
i can't seem to stop talking, especially with certain people. it doesn't matter if i just knew you or something,
i can just talk non stop. I met this girl recently through mutual friends, and she's a really good listener AND
commenter. gosh i love her. :) hahahh i like these kind of people.
i don't like people who just sits there and expects you to entertain them, just listening to you drone on and drone with little comments and enthusiasm to at least make an effort.
OR people who talk way too much and doesn't want to listen to your comments.
really thankful i have good conversationalists for good friends. :D

the weekends are too short :(
i barely have time for my family, MY BEST FRIENDS, my guy, my baby dog, my HOMEWORK ZOMG,
everything.
and time is ticking by like a timebomb, it's already the seventeenth of August. omfgg i wanna crrry.

oh and my skin's really bad these days.
i have horrible breakouts on my forehead, (like, really horrid ones). probably due to the emotional tantrums and avid stress. :( and i'm getting so tanned it's not even funny.
i look like a mess.
my foundation shade doesn't matches my skintone anymore because i'm so DARK. my pressed powder doesn't stick well to my face anymore because my skin's getting so dehydrated. my eyes are getting so puffy because i haven't been drinking enough fluids and getting enough shut eye, thanks to.... .

oh anyway, i know like theres several people (emails as well, oh my.) asking me to do makeup tutorials?
LOL.
are you effing joking me hhahahah :P
i'm barely talented in that phase. q: but just wondering, were you guys talking about M/U tutorials with pictures or just verbal words?
i'm pretty bad at expressing myself though, :( always giving misinterpretations and misunderstandings to people, it's really sad. :(
but just wondering though. :)

lookie @ my pimples & bad skin.
and i was laughing when i took the picture so excuse me. :)
i am going to look like a dead, tanned, ugly zombie tomorrow morning if i don't turn in now.

XOXO LOVE ALWAYS


you're just the one i've been waiting for,
i'll give you all that i have to give and MORE,
but please...
don't let me fall.

goodnight x

WORLD STAGE. :D
update soon. maybe tomorrow, or next week.

just wanna tell you something,
when i was listening to my favourite song ever ;
i wanna i wanna i wanna touch you, you wanna touch me tooo :D

my period effing came.
$%&*(^%$^&*()*&^*.

am i unlucky or am i unlucky?

on the battlefield of loveeeee♥ ♥ ♥

I LOVE MY BABY POODLE SO MUCH :p
okay maybe she's not so much a baby anymore, but you get my drift :)
i'm going out soon, :)
i still miss you, and all.
:) i hate zits on my forehead. sigh. :(
alright xx baby :)

sometimes, you gotta get fucked up to feel sober.
cry to see clear
and
fall down a hundred times before you learn to pick yourself up.

it's really late at night and honestly, tonight was so so so boring.
funny how a simple gesture or a sentence could transform your whole day, isn't it?
I'm going for MTV World Stage :O
yes, i know. i'm a hypocrite.
probably going to wake up really early tomorrow to wash my hair.
a little obsessive-compulsive in that gray,gray area hahh.
and i know i'm depressing everyone with my gloominess.




UGHHHHH. fuck.

Do you know whats worth fighting for?

today,school was filled with tears (albeit artificial ones), and lots of laughter.we did this titration thing during chemistry and i was with my girls while i was doing it so all's good. (YES i didn't had to endure my original PEKA group, thank goodness). Phenolphthalein's color is tres awesome! :D fuchsia infused with a dash of violet. :D then BM was spent passing notes to each other, hahahah.

I'm having physics tuition AGAIN later D: ugh time is flying by like, woosh. Probably going into the chapter of heat capacity and shit later on. I don't wanna go ugh.
World Stage's this saturday! I could get the Mosh Pit tickets but, seriously i don't think i'll have the mood squeezing in between fat, sweaty, disgusting people who's probably gonna be screaming their lungs out to Boys Like Girls or All American-Rejects.
wow. three of my most hated things wrapped up in one.
1. Sweating.
2. Sweaty people.
3. Sweaty people not realizing that they're sweaty.
ewwww. gross, I knowww. So, Melle, I don't think i'm gonna get them tickets anymore..
to divert your attention from all the SWEAT, I'm gonna think of some thing to say.
OH OH i've got one. :D I smell really nice.
No i'm not tooting my own horn but *toot toot* my hair smells really really good!
hahahahhahahahahahahah sorry. :( i'm pms-ing so i'm probably a little bit more cranky and mean.
I'm normally not that mean to the people i know D:
sigh i miss someone. :(
i hate it when i'm listening to a song which is really calm, quiet, serene and peaceful at the beginning then BOOOOOOM. all the bass and drums come on, pfff.
i have trust issues. D: with everyone. practically everyone.
i really really don't wanna go for physics tuition. D:
i'm an indolent pigggg. every teacher hates me. D:
i really really miss someone it's getting unhealthy.
POKER IS FUN. HHAHAH especially when you get lucky streaks. wooop. (and if you have people who constantly gives you free chips :D )
TIME IS FLYING TOO FAST. stop stop stop stop stop stop. sigh and here i am, being a hypocritical bitch, wasting it.
It'll be better to be spending the time snoozing and giving my badly wounded swollen eyes some time out. and i'm gonna go like,
Oh? i have tuition today? oops. i forgot.

Back to Square One

tu me manques :(

i'm so brutally honest.
today, after school we all went for Pn Teh's husband's wake. :(
it was sad. I don't know why i was the only one tearing,
perhaps it reminds of alot of things. :(
just realized,
that i need protection :(
back to square one again.

You can call it a game that everybody wins

it's so sad. :(
it's so sad it's depressing.
it's so sad when loving couples fight and squabble about the most
mundane, simple, silly, foolish things in life and make each other miserable. :(
maybe it's because i knew if i had a special someone that i really adore in real life i
would really appreciate him. and so i hope you would appreciate it all the same,
it's hard to come by ):
and i also realized im kind of sour-grapesy. it's like whenever my couple-friends decide
to get a joint blog, or couple seats when we go out for movies, or couple dinners when
we're out for dinner, or public display of affection - making me feel like a lightbulb *pff*
and i would go like, sulking and pouting and attention derived. :(
i'm fed up. fed up that i'm always so indecisive,
fed up that i'm insecure about absolutely everything, fed up that i trust people way too easily.
in better words, i would be naive. in harsher words, i would be an imbecile.
i'm fed up that i always seem to attract trouble, all the time.
i'm fed up that i choose to ignore the fact that i attract trouble all the time and go along with it
and get trodden on upon broken glass.
i'm fed up that i can't seem to control myself. i'm fed up that i'm always taking the road not coventionally taken.
the best decision would be to walk away, unhurt and untrodden,
with no more memories to be clinging on to, no more to relive - like a sieve ; our memory.
perhaps it's a good thing.
but can someone volunteer to make me more aware of others' motives?
i'm being bluffed at on a daily basis and i'm not leaving yet - belief of humanity.

alright, on a lighter note,
i think i slept for two hours in school today.
I KNOW I KNOW. i'm such a lackadaisical, indolent pig and i don't know what to do with myself.
but the thing is, i can't seem to concentrate in school and all i want to do is just to
close my eyes and drift away to wherever sleep gets me to.
ohhhhh shit. i wanna watch ghost of girlfriends' past! how many times have i said this already,
probably like a hundred.
oh is anything going to turn out good this year, honestly speaking?
people's been commiting suicide, not mentioning names, but definitely people around me.
and Pn Teh's husband passed away last night, according to reliable sources. :(
everyone's probably going to pay condolences tomorrow. so gloomy.
He (Pn Teh's husband) was a really kind man who even offered me and Samantha a drive home
from school last year, and yesterday he passed away due to cancer.
and with everything happening,
everyone fighting, friends squabbling and refuse to look each other in the eye,
parents arguing and not paying fuck's attention to people who actually are getting hurt by them,
it's just a huge blow.
Zoe, Gavin and me are probably going to the cremation tomorrow. :(
in a totally caliginous mood now, somber.
oh and by the way, i totally embarrassed myself and said 'crenation' instead of cremation earlier on.
hahahah crenation's actually osmosis, a process which a cell was immersed in a hypertonic solution.
normally happening to erythrocytes.
stupid girl making silly mistakes. :P
alright, I'm gonna go search my wardrobe for something black now.

I WANNA I WANNA I WANNA
TOUCH YOU
YOU WANNA
TOUCH ME
TOO




BUT..

i wanna i wanna i wanna touch you, you wanna touch me too :D

hellooo. :) how are your weekends? hahaha,
mine was spent entirely with Zoe and Lynn. went over to her parent's house in Sepang on Friday night
:O her brother Shawn drove us there and his driving is seriously terrifying :O
Lynn begs to differ, she likes it wild. HAHA raunchyyy :P
so we reached at about 9.30PM and went for dinner :D and we went to the beach the next day, :O
it was really really burning burning hot and i finished my entire tube of sunblock.
oh my. but i still think i'm a shade darker.


oh haha we stayed there for like two nights and we went to two beaches
consecutively :P


my Billabong thongs which SUCKS. :P
i screwed the left one.
Before it's screwed. :(
it's also a birthday present from Melle.

puffy fish which we poked and poked and pushed into the sea :O

Anyway we literally ate like PIGS there. we were almost eating every second,
and i also tasted Bak Kut Teh meat for the first time! :P
also did alot of things for the first time :) :)
and realized jumping shots are really really tiring!
i think we took like a hundred jumping shots,
thanks to the sequence function.
crabs! :O
THE CUTEST PIGLET EVER!!!!
SO CUTE SO CUTE SO CUTE.
before it began screaming.
MEEEE with no makeup on :P



anyway today's also ZOE's BIRTHDAY! :D
finally finally finally you're in our league being sixteenagers. :P
finally you're legal to have raunchy sex, hahaha!
on my birthday,
on your birthday,
on sports day, where we loitered behind the hall when everyone's
at the field looking at medal presentations :P
(also shirley's birthday!)

when we finished this bigass thing on Gavin's birthday!
(last week)
four of us! omg we are spectacular.
Zoe and Gavin's dead look :O
:D
XOXO,
LOVE ALWAYS

better break before you're broken

helloooo mein schatz. :)
its 5pm, and i'll have to be ready in 2 hours. :O
going t crash @ Zoe's place, which is 2 hours drive away near KLIA oh my. :O
today i did hardcore cardio!
woah. i should probably go bathe right now,
i just spent 3 minutes here :P
im listening to the coolest song. :D
OKAY! im gonna update soon,
X

would you watch me walk away without a fight?

honestly my throat is hurting me sooooo much :(
its like the passageway is closing up and every breathe i take is just like sandpaper along my trachea. every word i say feels like im bursting open my alveolies. HAH i have no idea why thats relevant hee :P I've been taking meds DAILY, drinking like a fish, eating healthily,and NOT SMOKING but it's still hurting me so much :( it hurts me so bad that i don't even have the gist to go out :( GRRRRRARRRGH.

@ Manhattan's fish market

its hurting me so much i don't even want to speak anymore.
i think someone passed it on to me! eeeeeek. D:
oh and the weekends are coming again! probably going to the beach on Saturday,
salt, sand and sun! woop.
time is moving along with me swirling alongside it, its overwhelming :O

okay. im gonna go massage my throat now. :D

and I'll wake up with my bra and my makeup

this is going to be a wordy post. or rather, a short one.
had physics & bm class test today.
archimedes archimedes archimedes.
my best friend's hotttt. oh oops. :P
its a pretty cold day today, chills.
one more disciplinary case and i'm suspended for good.
how am i gonna last 13 months without at least another disciplinary case?




alright i'm gonna go make out with myself now,

yuuum.

I've got a feeling, that tonight's gonna be a good nigh

the black is making me depressed.
does it have the same effect on you? :O
i don't know why.. but i've been feeling lightheaded lately, its almost a daily routine. definitely something to be worried about. Am also still having a hyperactive running nose, and is it me, or is everyone sick nowadays? another thing to be worried about.
a random snippet ; i think people with retainers are shooo cuteeeeee. :D
not '' i-wanna-shag-em'' cute but kind of like 'aww' cute. :D
i know,im actually serious.
oh my. i also realized, the person who shamelessly took my journal obviously has no life so he has to go reading mine. Couldn't actually blame pathetic people, guess i was being too rash (oh oh,whats new?) earlier on.
and oh my.
i sometimes, really really dread people saying,
'' Oh I saw you yesterday'' / '' Oh I saw you earlier ''.
i quite fancy my privacy,you see. so even if you saw me or whatever please keep it to yourself!!!
feeling kind of indolent right now.
celebrating the poodle's birthday tomorrow :D
she's turning 5! :D
couldn't imagine life without her, although she annoys the crap outta me at times. :)
oh and by the way. i hate fights. quarrels. squabbles. creative discussions.
whatever rocks your boat. i can't take them.
i don't fancy being in one, don't quite fancy seeing my loved ones being in one,absolutely
loathe it when my PARENTS are in one, don't quite like it when other people do it in front of me,
but the entertainment is amusing at times.
aaaah. i also hate it when i'm fighting a losing battle.
:(
this post is SO random.. I should probably be doing my add math work,
well RE-doing it is the more appropriate term i suppose. Thank you, lifeless erectile dysfunction small phallus
asshole, for making my life just a LITTLE bit worse.

thieves need no sympathy

it's Gavin's birthday! :D
Zoe, Carena and I made him a super cute carddd :D
which was made impromptuly but oh well.
after school,
went to have lunch with Gavin himself, Zoe, Carena, Ting Wei and
Cheryl.
ohh i almost died after eating.
after TW and Cheryl went back, the four of us
finished an effing HUGE milk tea thingy majigg.
it. was. horrible.
i swear i puked and swallowed it.
i have some pictures of it which would come next time.
wow. still so bloated, ouch. :(

anyway, i also wanted to blog about something
today in school,
during history period, the teacher was absent so me, Zoe and Carena
went out of class to do some phoning.
when i came back, i searched for my journal to jot down some stuff.
oh guess what?
it was effing missing.
this is NOT the first time it's gone missing,
first time was perhaps two months ago, but
i found it obviously. in a guy's bag.
this time,
i wasn't so lucky. i didn't manage to find it and i was so
effing pissed and scared.
you must be thinking,
oh my, it's just a NOTEBOOK for goodness sake.
don't be such a drama whore or whatevs.
but it means ALOT to me.
i wrote like, EVERYTHING inside.
all my feelings. like real real feelings right from the bottom of my heart.
intimate intimate stuff.
and now it's missing.
oh wait, MISSING is overrated. it was STOLEN.
very obviously stolen.
My friends and I made a big commotion about it,
searching bags but to no avail,
-of course not.
would the thief be such an imbecile to be keeping it in their bag?
obviously i won't be getting it back any sooner,
because when i DO find out who the thief is,
i swear i would report to someone and make him have a D3.
stealing others' property. i'm sure it's a big offense here in Taman S.E.A.
How am i so sure it's a GUY by the way?
I just do.
oh and yes by the way,
i have my ADDMATH homework inside the book,
and i'm supposed to be passing it up first thing in the morning tomorrow,
and since i DO NOT have the book
i don't know how i'm gonn do that.
to the thief,
do you think it's just a simple practical JOKE?
that you're just gonna steal someone's personal belongings
and laugh about it without a care?
didn't think i was gonna make such a big deal out of it yeah?
well, you're wrong.
when i find out who you are,
i'm gonn effing cut off your balls, i'm serious.
this is not some normal NOTEBOOK that you're messing about,
this journal contains the most privatest things you can NOT imagine,
and i am NOT gonna make this case rest.
i hope you get erectile dysfunction.
i am so mad, so pissed,
YOU ARE SO UTTERLY DESPICABLE.
UURRRRRGHGHHHHHHGHGHGHGH.
i want to bloody take my mascara wand and poke it into your eye.
whoever took it is probably having a good time viewing into my
life right now,
reading about my heartbreaks, my dramas, my hatred, my infatuation,
my family drama, my screwed up friendship, my secret wishes...
INTERESTING isn't it?
HAPPY now aren't you?
just pray (I BET YOU'RE ATHEIST ANYWAY, THIEF) that you won't get
caught because

I'M GONNA MAKE YOUR LIFE A LIVING HELL

but whoever who finds it by serendipity,
(wherever the thief decides to leave it)
will get a reward.

just ONE night couldn't be so wrong? :P

♥♥♥
the weekends got me so exhausted!
i just got back from dinner.
very bloated dinner!
and i bought like a million eyelashes.
alright exaggeration, again :P
and its like 11PM right now,
today school was as expected,
tres exhausted.
i fell asleep mentally during chemistry,
CHEMISTRY, CAN SUCK IT.
aaaah.
im not even joking or being sarcastic.
and don't get me started on the WEATHER.
oh my oh my.
stupid weather, CAN SUCK IT.
oh yeh. oooh holidays!
yes i can't wait! again!
was planning to go to BALIIIIIII/Redang
ahhhh but i don't know, lots of unforeseen circumstances wtf.
at least i still hope i'm going t either one of em.
:D
oh and its like Gavin's birthday in an hour!
gotto go prep myself with my phone, hee.
oh you know what,
i know i may sound like a conceited bimbo...
but..
i beg to differ.
OKAY OKAY. GOODNIGHT.
hahahahhah can't wait till the WEEKENDS and it's only monday!

XOXO ,
LOVE ALWAYS

♥♥♥

oh no i'm moving on.

hey hey sexy sexy readers. :D
it's.. almost 1AM and i have school, assembly tomorrow
and i'm probably gonn be drop dead exhausted but yeah, whatevs im living
in the moment heh.
i was trying t cram my weekends with everything possible
so i could be kept busy.
busy Pei Jiun = won't be thinking of any other stuff.
and during weekdays i'll probably be stuffing my face with studying.
On Friday,
there was school and i can't remember what i did anymore. :O
oh anyway after school Zoe, William and me went to have lunch.
and we spent 45 minutes at the drugstore lol is that
even remotely possible? :P
and we facebooked alot while having lunch too, hahh!
or its like - me and William facebooked alot. :P
Zoe was merely being patient with us hahahh.

well on Saturday, was supposed to go for
Interact Installation but yeah i bailed it. went for Chia Sing's
sweet 16th ooh yay.
:D Happy be-earlied birthday anyway Chia Sing!
even though it's technically still August 3rd and theres still there more
days till your official day. :)
oh my oh my we have known each other for so many years now! 4 years
to be exact. :D
we have both grown so much, :)
so yeah the thing is kind of a barbeque-pool themed?
too bad the barbeque thing didn't REALLY work out in the beginning..
but oh well all's good. (:
Andrea, Jesslyn, Birthday Girl♥,Michelle, PJ.
aw yeah poor thing.
this happened after Wei Hong smashed her face with chocolate cake :O
rockstarrr. :P
Amelia.
Williaaaaaaam. ;D
Ashley.
Annita.

Annita, Jesslyn, Chia Sing, PJ, & Andrea
Yours trulyyy. :)
Annita, Wei Hong, girl, Jesslyn, me :)
hahahah guess whooo!!!


with my sexy sparkly sequin bagg. :P
lol that night i was wearing something that i wore from home.
HAHAHH. like a tee and shorts. :P
and on Sunday, went to have lunch and a movieee,
The Proposal! ohhhh!
oh my oh my. it's a good movie!
it's really touching as well and Sandra Bullock is love.
hahah yeah i teareeed oh my oh my.
and my eyeliner was like smudging left right centre.
it was Lancome, don't get it ! especially
if you're sensitive sappy creatures like i am. hahhhh.
oh seems like Ghost of girlfriends' past is not out yet hah.
oh yeah and we were sitting next to some awesome people
in the cinema loool.
after that, it was something like 7.30PM and we went back homeee.

went for dinner @ around 8.30PM @ McD lool
fattening much yep yep.
had cheeezburger hohhh.
then waited for like an hour, then SJ cameee along with his laptop hah.
so we spent the next one and a half hour on facebook.
:P
got back home @ about 11 plus. yep.
and i just realized,
the music they play @ McD's like, exactly the same
as my playlist in my iTunes. oh my oh my. :P
oh yes!
i was so fascinated by this french fry!
so super long right! :P
i didnt wanna eat it but i ended up eating it anyway HAH :P
that reminded me of a conversation between Will, Zoe and me.
William was like,
'' Oh my this french fry is so long ''
*holding up french fry for demonstration*
then Zoe said,
'' is it as long as yours? ''
HAHAHAHAHAHAHHHA.
OH MY OH MY.
tres lolarious oh my gosh. :P

oh my guess who's birthdays coming up?
GAVIN'S!!!!!
yes yes yes GAVIN NEO. :P
on the fourth!!!!
don't forget to wish him sexys.

and MY POODLE'S!!!!!!
yes yes yes Happy!! :P
on the fifth!!!!
don't forget to wish her too!
it's her 5th birthday and it's gonna be very special
cuz my mom's gonna be doing something unique for the poodle. :O
yeah i know! i didnt even get cake for my birthday hahahah :P

and...
ZOEEEEEEE LEE!!!
ooooh ! aaaah! oooooH!!!
yuppers yuppers.
it's her very sweet 16th!! :P
so don't forget to wish her either! it's on
the tenth! :D

and lots lots lots more
but it's abit on the other side of August so coming up next!
hahahah! :D
i love love birthdays. its such a happy occasion and i really
do think that birthdays are really important and shouldn't be
forgotten or forsaked!
yup! :D
i just realized i don't smile in pictures.
:O
im serious.
does it make me look like so emofck?
hahahah :P
goodnight sexys.

aah, P/S
i can't seem to recall how your voice sounds,
i don't remember how you smell like anymore,
i can't remember how your sarcastic laugh sounds either,
my memory's escaping me and i can't seem to relive them.
i think i'm moving on..♥

goodnight.
XOXO,
♥♥♥♥ love always ♥♥♥♥

a fortnight doesn't seem too long did it?

read this one post that i posted last year.
exactly something like a year ago,
it may happened to me quite a long time ago..
but i think i am feeling the same thing.
read it HERE.

im free todayyy. ;)
until night time that is, and it's already 2.30PM here.
im home on a nice saturday afternoon!
im a loserrrr. hah.